Martha's Vine: The Novel

Thursday, December 30, 2010

The fear of success?

What exactly is this fear of success? I have never understood that quaint little expression. "You aren't doing (whatever it is the well-meaning person feels you should be doing) anything about it, because you fear success."

How does any breathing human fear success? What? The good feelings might be overwhelming? The fame a little suffocating? How about the newfound wealth? Too much for you?

Nope, I beg to differ... I have fears, but not of success.

For instance, I fear never being able to finish the sequel to Martha's Vine -- that's a staggering fear. I fear the discomfort of not being able to think up the next scene. I fear forgetting the next scene that came into my head while I was driving down the road or taking a shower, circumstances making it impossible to capture my thoughts as they occurred.

A new fear just arose today: what if I stopped liking my characters? What if I stopped caring about their struggles, their hopes, their dreams, their survival. What then? What if they stopped talking to me? What if they all went mute and refused to give up their tale? What then?

I fear alright, every day... but not success. I don't even fear failure. Rather, I fear the discomfort, the indecision, the angst, and the annoying hand-wringing despair that can lead to failure.

Thank goodness for friends who may not experience the same fears, but who tug you along by your hand, speaking kind words and offering warm hugs. For with them, I can get by the silly fears. And the big fears? God handles those.

Happy New Year! May 2011 bring you great joy and much success in all your endeavours. God bless you all.

~~Sheree~~